River-Rat Reflections

Thursday, August 14, 2008

A POOR CANDIDATE FOR TORTURE

As a church historian I know well the stories of torture and persecution--and not just way back in history. Such continues today. I've often wondered how faithful I would be in the face of torture. This morning I spent much of an hour contemplating that. I was scheduled for an MRI and learned after I was flat on my back on a metal table that the procedure takes about an hour. I never sleep on my back because of the discomfort it causes me---with my low back problems. Here I was unable to move for an hour, and to make matters worse something went wrong with one of the images so they had to leave me under the machine for anothr 10 minutes. I wondered how long it would take before I would deny the Lord just to be set free! The MRI was one more step in this long dog-bite ordeal. Hopefully, with the proper treatment, my leg will heal.

About Me

I am married to John Worst and have a son and granddaughter, Carlton and Kayla Tucker (now married to Ariel Sosa) as well as two step-daughters, Laura and Sarah and three more grand-kids, Mitch, Ashley and Zach. I did my doctoral degree in history and have written more than twenty books and have taught at colleges and seminaries for more than 30 years. John taught music at Calvin College for 35 years and holds a Ph.D. from the University of Michigan. Besides reading and folk-art painting, my favorite activities (with John) are hiking, biking and kayaking. Most of our days are spent at our shop, Carlton Gardens, which we refer to as a "hobby gone wild."

My Calvin Seminary Story

I began teaching at Calvin Theological Seminary in 2000--the first full-time woman professor in the school's 125-year history. In 2003, less than 3 months after Cornelius Plantinga, Jr. was installed as the new president, I was, without warning, removed from tenure track and given a terminal appointment. I have repeatedly asked that all the evidence be opened only to be blocked by a dishonest cover-up. When independent mediators were retained by the seminary board in 2005, they called for "retroactive pay to 2003" and my appointment as full professor. They also stated that the charges against me were inflammatory and should be removed from the record. That report was buried. I finished my second terminal appointment on August 31, 2006, and shortly thereafter published my story here.

A Provocative Poem

PEDESTALS

Thousands
cheer,
chant,
and clap
as one of their own
is proudly carried toward the
lofty pedestal.
The audience
urges him
up the stairway,
step by step,
higher and higher,
far above the masses
on the prominent platform.
The media is there
with lights,
cameras
and prime-time coverage.
Publishers huddle
around the base,
for they know
pedestal-people
sell well.
The crowds
on satellite hook-ups
hang on
every last word,
for he seems
so close to eternity.
Yet he feels
unsure,
unworthy,
afraid
and very alone . . .
But at that height
no one notices,
no one questions,
no one confronts.
And so,
in a split second,
the trap door swings,
the noose tightens,
the crowd gasps.
Undeterred, the mob moves on
to build more pedestals;
to encourage another
of their own
up the starlit steps.
But mostly
to wonder
why those
at the pinnacle
keep falling
from the heights.
© 1988 James N. Watkins