This evening I went to the salon for my quarterly perm.  I always dread it.  It wouldn't be so bad if I were able to have general anesthesia but I can't find a salon that offers it. I'm actually looking for some kind of a franchise that offers a perm and a colonoscopy at the same time. That would at least give me some time in the recovery room to get used to how I look when the perm is finished. To say I've stuck my finger in a light socket doesn't fully capture the image. It's not a pretty sight. But after 5 weeks I look okay---for a week. Then I see my stylist again for a highlight and cut which takes away all the curl. I'm back to fine, thin, straight hair that's tormented by a colic.  O, to be an old man (like John) or an alien, where bald seems almost to be in fashion.